These Masks We Wear
by monkkeyslut
Summary: Everyone wants them to be something they're not, and they all hide, because that's what people do best. Seven shot. Complete
1. M'gann M'orzz

This is slightly dark, but it's the first of seven drabbles about the team.

**Character: **M'gann M'orzz/ Miss Martian

**Pairing:** Slight Supermartian

**I do not own this.**

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><p>"Superboy, hi!" M'gann calls as the teen walks into the room. He glances at her then makes his way to the couch, sitting down and turning on the TV. He is still as he watches the static flicker across the screen.<p>

"Everyone's coming soon," she says, hand scrubbing at a plate. Her scrubs a little too hard, and her hand slips, splashing water up from the sink. Grimacing, she plucks the hand towel from beside her and wipes at her neck. "Are you excited?"

"For what?" Superboy asks, not turning around. "They come over every Friday."

"Well…yes," she murmurs slowly. "I just—we haven't seen them all week. Hopefully Wally and Artemis don't fight _too_ much."

"Why? They don't fight with you," Superboy tells her, and she glances over at him, eyebrows furrowed. "I—I know. It's just…sometimes it can get annoying."

"But _why?"_ Superboy prompts, turning slightly. "They aren't fighting _you."_

Instead of fighting, M'gann sighs, turning back to the sink. "I know."

* * *

><p>i.<p>

Back on Mars, there was a boy.

He was nice, and sweet, and she doesn't remember his name. She didn't really know him. He was older, but he was so nice to everyone—

But things change.

* * *

><p>"Will you <em>get a room?"<em> Robin snaps, fingers moving swiftly over his keyboard. "Seriously _not_ feeling the aster right now."

Artemis smacks him on the back of the head, and Wally's _"Dude!"_ is loud enough to make M'gann wince. They need to be quiet or someone will hear them.

Kaldur seems to notice this, and goes to intervene with the three, while M'gann stays back with Superboy. "How's your arm?" She asks, remembering the way he'd cried out when the man had pulled it.

"S'fine," he replies gruffly, eyes looking everywhere but her. "Why?"

She doesn't know why. "I don't know, just wondering."

Superboy eyes her, brows pulling together.

"You wanna talk about getting a room," Artemis remarks, glaring at Robin. "Then look at Super_idiot_ and Miss Subtle."

The blonde is unusually mean that night, and M'gann doesn't understand why. Superboy also doesn't speak to her for the rest of the night.

* * *

><p>ii.<p>

The boy was beautiful.

On the outside, yes, of course he was, but especially on the inside. M'gann would see glimpses of him a lot, when he helped with the children or elderly.

He never called her by her name though. And when he pushes her into her room, the night after her sister and him get engaged, she's happy that he doesn't say her name.

And in the morning, when her mother and father asked her how she slept, she had to keep the bile from rising.

* * *

><p>Artemis doesn't show up for the next mission, and nobody knows where she is, though they don't tell the team this.<p>

M'gann is pulled aside by Wally, his usual joyfulness gone. "You didn't read her mind or anything before she left last week, did you? Did she seem off? Rob thinks so too…"

Wally reminds her of the Martian boy. Before he—before he hurt her and when he's not flirting with her, or trying to make Artemis jealous. And Artemis—well M'gann hadn't read her mind, but the…the fear that stained the girls every move was enough to make her nod.

"Something…did seem off…"

* * *

><p>iii.<p>

The Martian boy goes off to fight the—the White Martian's, and M'gann's sister cries, because her fiancé might not come back.

M'gann cries too, but it's not because she misses him.

* * *

><p>When Artemis comes back, she's scared and dirty and in Roy's arms.<p>

He carries her through the tunnel and into the training room, walking past the teenagers and straight to Black Canary who takes one look at them and tells Roy to follow her. Artemis meets M'gann's eyes over Roy's shoulder, and M'gann can just make out the fear and anxiety in her eyes.

Nobody comments on her ripped civilian clothes.

* * *

><p>iv.<p>

When the Martian boy comes back, he is in pieces. Literally.

And M'gann finally learns what it's like to sleep easily.

* * *

><p>Everyone is back to normal. Well, as normal as possible, and it's a Sunday night when M'gann comes to get a glass of water and sees Superboy. He's sitting on the couch, but the TV is off.<p>

"Superboy?" She asks cautiously, moving towards him. He turns slightly, and she can just barely make out the tear tracks on his face. Before she can ask what's wrong, he's up in an instant, in her face and pressing her harshly against the counter.

"I'm never _good enough,"_ he tells her harshly, and she wants to tell him that he is. That he is absolutely and completely and _totally worth it._ But the words won't come out, and the empty liquor bottle is poised dangerously on the edge of the counter next to her.

"I'll never be enough, and I don't know how I can prove that I'm good. I've tried _everything!"_ He's yelling now, and soon Red Tornado will be in there with them, pulling Superboy away from her.

He grits his teeth and leans forward so they're nose to nose. "I can't be what he wants me to be," he hisses, eyes flashing, and she's so scared because _she's never seen him like this—_

His mouth is close. God, it's so close to hers, and all she wants to do is lean forward (_just a taste, only a taste-)_ but she doesn't because his hands dig angrily into her sides, and tears leave new paths down his cheeks, and he's sobbing into her shoulder then.

"I can't tell him," he hiccups against her. "He'll think it's weak and I can't be weak. I'm a weapon and weapons are not _weak."_

Hands shaking, M'gann raises them, rubbing smooth circles into Superboy's back. "Its okay—"

"_No it's not!"_ He roars, anger filling him again, and he's back in her face. "It's not okay! I don't have _anywhere to go_ I don't have _anyone!"_

Her heart stutters, and it's not one of those heart-stuttering happiness things, it's a heart-stuttering heart _ache_ because Superboy has the whole team. He has _her._

He moves away then, sitting back down on the couch. "Just leave me alone."

When she makes it to her room, the tears have already begun, and she buries the sobs into her pillow.

* * *

><p>v.<p>

_("Just like that," he tells her. "Don't __**cry**__, they'll hear you." He tells her. "You don't want your sister to find us like this do you?")_

No, she doesn't.

* * *

><p>Artemis tells them what happened to her. About how the man—she still doesn't know who it was—how he raped her, and beat her, and and and—<p>

M'gann leaves in the middle of Artemis' talk, ignoring the questions and looks.

Her sister never finds out.

She takes a shower, though she doesn't really need to, and scrubs her skin raw, watching as red marks take their place against her green skin.

She didn't feel this dirty before. Before when he—

So why does she now?

* * *

><p>vi.<p>

They talk about him always. About what a wonderful person he was. How caring and generous and loving he was.

She thinks of all the things that completely disregard that.

* * *

><p>Her friends knock on her door, and since she doesn't open it, Artemis strolls in, boys on her heels. "What's wrong?"<p>

M'gann hides under the covers, slows her breathing, and hopes that they think she's sleeping.

"She is probably not used to hearing about how…cruel humans can be," Kaldur supplies. She hears her friends sigh, and they leave the room.

M'gann knows all about cruelty.

* * *

><p>vii.<p>

"Did you love him?" her sister asks voice hoarse. "Did you?"

She thinks maybe she did, before. But she hates him now.

"Yes," she tells her sister, and the green-skinned Martian seethes with rage as she leaves M'gann's room, slamming her door shut.

Something inside M'gann wonders why nobody has noticed what he did to her. They are mind readers, after all.

* * *

><p>"Hey," Robin smiles at her when she comes into the training room. She smiles at him, and everyone else, but doesn't offer an explanation as to why she left the previous night.<p>

"Why're you in your stealth gear?" Wally asks, shoving chips into his mouth. "We haven't even been assigned a mission."

M'gann blushes, "I just—I wanted to be prepared."

* * *

><p>viii.<p>

When her uncle comes to visit, she's ready and planning on leaving.

He takes her with him.

* * *

><p>They verse someone who can make your worst nightmare come to life.<p>

Needless to say, her friends have found out.

* * *

><p>ix.<p>

Her sister hugs her when she leaves.

_I get it sister,_ she tells her. _I know what he did to you._

* * *

><p>She has to go through a long conversation with her uncle.<p>

He tells her it wasn't her fault. He says she didn't do anything wrong. He says she should have told him sooner.

J'onn tells her to go to sleep. She leaves the room, ignoring everyone.

It's around two in the morning, and she hasn't slept at all, so when her door opens, and her friends pile into her room, all in pajamas. They stand at the foot of her bed, watching her. M'gann's chin trembles, and they all crawl into the bed with her.

Once everyone is situated and comfortable, Superboy on her left and Artemis on her right, while the others are spread out somewhere next to them, she sleeps.


	2. Wally West

This one is hardly my favorite, but whatever.

**Character: **Wally West

**I do not own this.**

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><p>"Wally?"<p>

His mom is behind him, watching as his hands shake with anger, how his face is red with rage. How absolutely pissed he is. She places a hand on his shoulder, but the hand isn't a comfort now. It's annoying.

"It's not a big deal, son." His father tries from his place on the couch. His aunt stares at him, her green eyes knowing. Uncle Barry is watching his every move.

He's moves fast, and he's out the door quickly. Barry doesn't stop to catch him, and he's thankful for that.

Suspended. He'd been fucking _suspended_ because he'd missed too many days. Too many days he spent recovering from missions or still being _out _on the missions. And his family- they took it like this was a _good_ thing. Like it didn't really matter because he's smart and he can catch up when he gets back in two weeks.

But this isn't good.

His shoes are heating up, and he's going fast, he's going to hit the Speed of Light. He is.

_No you won't._

He skids to a stop, stumbling, hitting water.

Figures he'd be at Mount Justice.

He sits on the beach, staring out at the water and wonders why he wanted to become a hero.

_So you could wear a cool uniform. So you could meet The Flash. So you could be a __**hero.**_

But heroes don't get anywhere. They get killed. They miss out on huge opportunities in their civilian lives because _fuck_ they missed so much school that they couldn't keep up.

"_Baby you're smart, you'll catch up."_

"_Yeah," Barry says quickly, touching his nephew's shoulder. "If you need help, I can tutor you."_

_Wally sneers, "Because you have so much free time."_

_His aunt doesn't say anything._

Iris Allen-West knows Wally better than anybody. She knows what he's afraid of ("_oh god the spiders-")_ she knows what he really thinks when his mentor tells him that he's missing school for a mission. She knows that a normal teenager would be psyched, but not Wally.

He wishes she would speak up sometimes; tell everyone that he's only just a kid. That he's not Kid Flash twenty-four seven, and that he's not just a superhero. He has a life; he has friends, homework, and school. She does say something, and Barry tells him that he doesn't have to go on every mission, but the look on his parents face when he leaves, the look of such admiration and how proud they are that _their boy_ is a hero—it's too much.

Maybe one day he just won't come back. Maybe he'll run away. He could fake his own death.

But that would be the easy way out, and heroes don't know what the word easy means.

His cell phone vibrates in his pocket. Pulling it out, he flips it open.

"Dude," Rob says. "Where are you?"

"I'm uh—" he glances at the mountain behind him. "I'm on my way."


	3. Dick Grayson

Again, Dick's isn't my favorite, but I'm proud of it.

**Character: **Dick Grayson/ Robin

**I do not own this.**

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><p>It's funny, because he has a name.<p>

His name isn't Robin. No, his name is Richard "Dick" Grayson, and his friends should know that. He's not just Robin. He's not his mask; he's not just Batman's sidekick, or just part of Young Justice.

No, he's a thirteen year old boy, with a crush, and friends, and a mathletes medal. He likes sports, and he hates the bullies at his school who torment him for having the name Dick, and he likes Lizzie, who smiles at him with her purple braces and bright blue eyes.

He likes Wally and Kaldur and Megan and Superboy, and sure, Artemis is fine and funny, so he kind of likes her too. He likes Batman and Barbra, even though she's irritating and annoying and _infuriating_, but it doesn't really matter.

No, what matters to Dick, doesn't really matter to anyone else. Because Robin is thirteen, and he can't judge things, or look at situations the way Batman can. He can't _see _like Batman can.

But he's not Batman, either.

He's not just another carbon copy of the Dark Knight; he's a boy, who wishes that he could be honest and truthful.

Wally knows, Wally always knows, Wally is always _there._ He's the constant in Dick's life. And M'gann, it'd be so easy for her to find out, but she respects his privacy and Artemis, fuck, he sees her at school so _how does she not know!_

One day he'll be lost—Dick will be lost, and nobody will ever find him again.

Sometimes, on the nights where Bruce—_Batman—_is busy, Dick goes. He just goes, and tries to remember easier times, where he could fly high, high, high. Fear was never there, only adrenaline and love. Love for the other flying people, and the magic makers, and the animal tamers.

But love, like all things, doesn't last. And he'll love his parents until the day he dies—he will. But something—something dark, and sad, and angry inside him hates them _just a little bit_ for dying.

It's stupid, really, because you can't prevent Death. If he wants you badly enough, he'll get you. So when Dick thinks about his parents—of the way the fell onto the ground, lifeless, he pretends like God wanted them to play in his circus, where all the greats go.

And Dick, well the happy, bright, _smiling_ part of him, is proud of his parents for achieving something so great.

He hopes he can achieve it too one day.


	4. Artemis Crock

I imagine she loves her dad a lot.

**Character: **Artemis Crock

**I do not own this.**

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><p>"Mom?" Artemis calls, tossing her school bag on the ground. "I'm home!"<p>

She walks to the kitchen, kicking off her runners as she goes. When she turns the corner though, it isn't her mom who's there.

"Dad?"

The blonde man turns around, a grin on his face. "Hey sweetie," he says, holding his arm out for a hug. His other arm is—oh god he's cooking.

Artemis races to his side, wrapping her arms tightly around him. "Hi dad," she murmurs against his shirt, and he smells just like she remembers, Axe and sweat and just a bit like blood. "Where's mom?" She asks, pulling away and looking at what he's cooking. The spaghetti—well the noodles aren't supposed to look like that.

"Gone for the weekend to her sister's," he says, stirring the noodles more. Artemis grabs his hand, prying it away from the spoon. "You fucked up the noodles," she tells him.

"Language," he mutters, walking towards the table. "You got a phone book? Let's order pizza. Your mom told me not to but—eh, what the hell?" he's grinning again, and Artemis feels herself grinning also. He notices her new uniform, but he doesn't say anything.

Once the pizza is there, and the two are chowing down, he asks, "So how is the team?"

His eyes are hard, but his face is relaxed, and something inside her tells Artemis that this was all just a little trap to make her spill the beans. "Good."

But her dad cares. If he didn't, he wouldn't have taught her how to defend herself, right? He wouldn't have been so nice. He wouldn't have come home, and she likes when he's home because everyone is so happy again—

"And things are good with you? The Martian and Atlantean don't suspect anything?" He bites into his pizza, and Artemis' gaze flits to behind him, where his duffle bag is. "Are you leaving?"

He can tell what she's trying to do. "I asked you a question young lady."

"I know," she says. "But we haven't seen each other in a long time and I was hoping maybe we could rent movies?"

His mouth turns down, and he reaches out to grab her hand, "I know baby, but I've got work—"

Snatching her hand away from his reach, Artemis says, "Superboy can't control his powers, M'gann can't read minds, Kid Flash is having problems with M'gann, Aqualad is having troubles using his sorcery and Robin might be leaving the team."

Her dad nods at all of these things, believing them. And when he leaves, she immediately reaches for her cell phone, dialing Ollie's number.

"I did it. Are you happy?"

"I know it was hard," he murmurs on the phone, and tears sting at her eyes. "But you're saving a lot of people. Especially your friends."

"I know."

She knows, really. But all she really wants to do is have her family together, and for her team to trust her and to just be fucking _normal for once._ She wants to stop being everyone's toy that they can fuck around with. Someone they can control. She _wants, wants, wants._

But wanting? It never gets your anywhere. You have to _do something_. And soon, she'll have to decide what she wants to do. Her dad, he'd never hurt her, but he could just as easily get Jade to do it. And her mom—well her mom would be an easy target too.

She has to choose. Light or Justice.

* * *

><p>She remembers when she was small, small enough to believe in hope and happiness and handsome princes saving the day, her father was there.<p>

He wasn't there all the time. He couldn't be. His job was too important, and one mistake could mean hurting her or her mother.

But when he would come home—always too late for her to be awake, he would stand in her doorway of whatever cheap apartment they could afford at the time, and he would watch.

Through the years, his sweet, innocent little daughter lost it. Lost her innocence the first chance she got lost the braids for a stiff pony tail. She lost her happiness.

Her walls, once bright green (because she doesn't like pink, never has) were covered in drawings and crayon and joyfulness. But the years went (_four, six, eight, ten)_ and the green walls became less and less vibrant.

Lawrence Crock notices this now, as he watches his fifteen year old daughter sleep. She mumbles and moves, but never wakes.

Something inside him wonders if this was right. If making her—if training her to be the best, was really worth it.

And when he thinks about it…_really_ thinks hard and long about it, he knows it's not. Artemis will never be the hoping, wishing, _praying_ child she once was, and he'll never be the father she wishes he could be.


	5. Kaldur'ahm

So this one isn't my favorite, and Kaldur isn't really someone I write a lot of, so I apologize if it's not to everyones expectations.

* * *

><p><em>for whatever we lose (like a you or a me),<em>

_it's always ourselves we find in the sea._

_- e.e. cummings_

* * *

><p>He aches for the water. For the cool, smooth waves to take him under, to pull him from his duties.<p>

He wishes that the sea could take away the pain; wash away the sadness, but it can't. Garth and Tula love each other, and if he were to go back, he'd be alone.

On the land, it's not much better. He sees M'gann and Superboy, the way they wade around each other, like oceans separated by continents. He notices Robin, who is free and who can fly, even though he's only just a human, graceful like a dolphin. He watches Wally and Artemis, like sharks, both going on for the kill. Kaldur is the calm, twilight water, the soft, pink reflecting against its body.

That's nice and all, being leader, being a friend, being the cool, calm, collected one, but sometimes Kaldur wishes he could be a little rebellious, a little loud.

And his team? They don't need him. Not like he needs them. He needs someone to latch on to, someone to anchor him to the surface, because he doesn't want to slip down into the depths of the ocean. He can breathe underwater, yes, but it's easier when there's someone who's waiting for him to surface.


	6. Connor Kent

I love me some Supey.

* * *

><p>He wonders if he is broken.<p>

Not—not because he can't fly (like Superman) or run fast (like the Man of Steel himself), but because…well he is a weapon. Weapons—they don't feel the things he feels. He feels happiness (but he doesn't react) and he feels sadness (but that's only when he realizes that he's alone) and he feels anger (all the time) and he feels, feels, feels, but he doesn't know how to go on. He feels like.

He _likes_ Wally and Robin and Kaldur, but not the same way he likes M'gann. And he likes M'gann, but not the same way he likes Artemis. It confuses him, but he doesn't say anything. He learned a while ago that clones don't speak unless spoken to. They don't _act_ without being given an order.

Sometimes Superboy wonders if he'll self-destruct _(3, 2, 1 KABOOM!) _but that's silly, because people don't self-destruct. Even if they are clones.

Then there are other times, when Superboy is alone, and M'gann is sleeping, and everything is quiet, and he wonders if he'll go to this Heaven that he'd heard of. He wonders if not Heaven then is there a place for useless, broken clones?

Probably not, but he'll keep searching.

It's no secret how unhappy Superboy is and it's no secret that he'll protect his friends to his dying breath.

But he doesn't tell people that it might come sooner, rather than later.

It starts with his fingers. They become cold, and Superboy shivers when he curls his fists, because the tips of his cold (_freezing, chilly, frosty)_ fingers touch his warm (_toasty, hot, sweaty) _palm. He freezes, and earns a punch in the jaw from Kaldur.

Next are his feet. He is running and he trips (_"Pullin' a KF, Supey?" Robin laughs)_ and he falls. And he is scared, because for a split second, he cannot feel his feet. M'gann flies over immediately, and Artemis enjoys the view of his behind sticking up, and Kaldur furrows his eyes.

Wally points out that they're still running from the bad guys.

Things keep happening, and soon he's just scared out of his wits, because if he dies, he doesn't want to be alone. So he tells his friends, and they tell Batman.

When it doesn't happen again, Superboy understands why they happened in the first place. His friends pay more attention to him now, and really, that's all Superboy wanted.

It's unfortunate he had to be sick for it to happen.


	7. Roy Harper

This didn't turn out the way I wanted it to, but I guess this'll do. Here is the final drabble.

Thanks for reading guys!

* * *

><p>"So I was talking to Megan," Wally shoves a few more pickles into his mouth, crunching nosily. Roy scowls at him, but continues fiddling with his arrow. "And…?"<p>

"Right, so there I was, putting on my charm and Artemis just comes up behind me, and _smacks me on the head!"_

Roy glances at his friend now, eyes lingering on his lips. For a second, Roy wonders what it would be like to press his own lips against Wally's. To know what the other boy tastes like—

But that's stupid.

"Robin says she likes me," Wally continues, propping his socked feet up onto the table. "And I mean—the girl is hot and all, but I don't like when they're tougher than me."

Wally blushes, "Crap. I totally did not just say that—"

Roy grins, "Whatever dude."

When Wally leaves later, Roy has to spend ten minutes in the bathroom, trying to ignore the way Wally hugged him close, and the way Wally smelled and _oh god he's not doing this now—_

It hurts Roy, because Wally's straight. He's the straightest fucker Roy's ever met, and it doesn't help that Robin's got Wally tied around his acrobatic fucking _finger_ and how Wally's whipped on Megan and how the speedster only ever has time for Roy _once in a while,_ when it used to be _always._

But it's not fair to Wally, so Roy'll keep his mouth _shut_ and keep his hormones to _himself_ and hope (_oh please oh God_) that it'll all go away. It's not fair to _Roy_ however, that everyone _he_ likes turns out to either be assholes or…well just never the right person, and Roy never gets what he wants.

He'll pretend like it doesn't bother him though. He'll pretend like everything is alright.

But it's not; it never is.


End file.
